Optimism

Friday was a nail biting day: Evan had a bone marrow biopsy and PET scan in Minneapolis. Meanwhile, in Rochester, Kit's fiancee, Violet, had surgery to remove a brain tumor. It's a good thing that smoking is no longer my worst bad habit, but I do admit to chain-chewing celery sticks at work all day.

We have no reason to believe that Evan's results will be anything but positive. He's in great shape and ready to pace himself back to work part-time. His doctor approved that plan. The report from Kit on Violet's surgery is also positive. The surgery went as expected with none of the worst fears realized. Naturally, she is in need of rest, but is communicating and reacting in ways that say it is fair to be very optimistic about the outcome of the surgery. Of course she has a long way to go with healing and then radiation, but the first step was surgery and that step was successful. We are very thankful.

Kit and I had a long conversation this morning and one of the things discussed was that we have become quite practiced about realistic expectations for receiving test results and prognosis. Evan, for example, will not receive his results until next Wednesday. On one hand, that seems a cruelly long amount of time for results; on the other, it's much more beneficial to wait for confirmed results than it is to hang all hope on preliminary educated guesses. Asking for prognosis is the same. When Evan was first diagnosed with cancer, I wanted all percentages of possibilities every step of the way. We don't ask anymore. In the end, none of those tables matter; all that matters is Evan.

The same is true for Violet. The diagnosis of a brain tumor is a shattering thing to hear. Violet and Kit though, have handled the news and the doctors and the treatments with amazing clarity of thought. When faced with difficult decisions, they sought out further advice at Mayo Clinic before making any hasty decisions. They manage to take things as they come and keep the most important factor of all as their focal point: Violet.

Not all that long ago, I shared some of my fears with Kit. Quoting Atticus Finch, he told me that it wasn't time yet to worry. I remind myself of that fairly often. Today is one of those times. Yes, there are still a lot of unknowns, but this is not the time to worry. It is the time to remain optimistic. And so, this afternoon, I am going to watch "To Kill a Mockingbird" while I cut out aprons and revel in the satisfaction and relief of optimism.